|
[15 Feb 2009|02:56am] |
FUCK VALENTINE'S DAY!
|
|
|
[30 Sep 2008|01:11am] |
Why the fuck can't I get a damn break from this karmic fucking circle? Why is it that every damn time I try to better myself, something comes along to fuck me over? I'm convinced to go to a party at a friends house. My uncle gets a job cleaning up after the hurricane in Texas. My aunt quits her job. My uncle falls off the back of a moving truck. I get to pick up a 6th day at work. He can't continue working, and has to come home. We can't afford the rent. I have to move to Florida. I turn THAT around, and make it a positive for myself. I manage to get 86 hours this pay period. I pop a tire on the way to Louie's.
I hate this circle.
|
|
|
[28 Sep 2008|07:37pm] |
For the first time in my life I have to make a REAL choice, and I'm afraid.
I have to decide if I can continue to live here, be miserable, and probably wind up offing myself. Or I can move to Tallahassee, work at ANOTHER Melting Pot, live rent free with my mother (until I can get a place of my own), and possibly succeed at life.
My love for this town is only equal to my hatred for the bar-people who inhabit it. But at the same time, I'm possibly moving to a town with nothing but college kids looking to get drunk nightly. I don't know what to do.
I've met a few great people here. Rachel, Lundy, Nina, Britton. These 4 I care about most. I can't stand the thought of leaving them behind, and never coming back. I'm afraid that they'll forget me.
I'm scared of growing up. Just like everyone else.
Guess I have to grow up to get over my fear of it.
This is going to be a bumpy ride.
|
|
|
[23 Sep 2008|12:49am] |
|
I don't understand people.
|
|
|
[17 Aug 2008|03:21pm] |
|
fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckufkfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck I can't think straight....aaghha....jesus...can't type....can't................................................................................................LAY OFF THE GODDAMN REDBULL!!>!>!W#KXC bn
|
|
|
[06 Aug 2008|01:14am] |
Why do I never write what I truly want to write?
Why do I hide behind false statements created to shroud my intentions?
|
|
|
[25 Jul 2008|03:57am] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Scars on Broadway - Insane |
] |
|
|
|
[17 Apr 2008|01:02am] |
| [ |
music |
| |
The beat of dephenhydramine coursing through my body. |
] |
Time again for me to worry about where I'm going to live, and this time I didn't cause the problems.
I can't say what I'm feeling. It feels like guilt. That guilt you get when you think it's your fault your parents are fighting. But this wasn't caused by me, but by my vodka-lovin' step-aunt. I don't know.
And this alone has ended my almost 3 weeks of not being depressed. I was actually starting to enjoy not having the constant feeling that I wanted to die. Damn my family for being catalysts to my self-inflicted problems. Damn them to hell.
|
|
|
[01 Apr 2008|10:00pm] |
|
Why am I afraid of social situations?
|
|
|
[29 Jan 2008|12:39am] |
|
I hate you all so much right now, I can't see straight.
|
|
|
[15 Jan 2008|06:54pm] |
She's taking over the world. RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!! She won't stop until we are all her unwitting slaves. Chained to oppressive ankle, forced around to do her bidding. Don't watch this channel. DON'T LISTEN TO THE LIES!!! DON'T LET HER INTO YOUR HOMES!!!!
IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT!!!
THE END IS NIGH!
THE END IS NIGH!
|
|
|
[07 Jan 2008|09:17pm] |
|
When posting, it is proper to correlate with your brain. To be in sync with it, so that non-coherent thoughts trickle out, like scarabs. Confounded cynicism has forsaken the lonely man.
|
|
|
[06 Dec 2007|03:17am] |
| [ |
music |
| |
System of a Down - Roulette |
] |
I wanna post something, but I don't know what to post. Except I'm posting this, so theoretically I have something to post while thinking that I don't have anything to post. But then my first statement is now false because I've accepted that I have this to post, but at the same time I can't erase it for this would no longer make sense. Interesting conundrum. But what is the answer? Do I not post this? If I do that, then me typing this is futile and I should just abandon it, but I'm gonna post it. So do I just let you all read my lie? Hoping you'll still love and accept me even though I've written a lie? Or should I just not mention the lie? Except I've mentioned it. And I still can't erase it. What have I gotten myself into here. I've become a liar. What is to become of me now? I think I'll lead a life of crime. I'll start off by lying to people about stuff. Then maybe work my way on to kidnapping. Yea. I like that. or I'll open a store. One or the other. But then I'm really just lying to you. Thus continuing the first lie because you don't know if I'm lying about post or if I'm lying about lying as a professional criminal career. YOU DON'T KNOW!!! I've just boggled and destroyed my mind with this revelation. I'm going to bed.
Don't make me take this can-opener and open your can!
A.B.
|
|
|
[01 Oct 2007|10:54pm] |
THIS JUST IN!!!
I stapled a Palmetto bug (read: HUGE FUCKING COCKROACH) to my floor.
THAT IS ALL!!!
|
|
|
[30 Sep 2007|01:27am] |
|
Random non-friends-only post.
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
anthrax_boy's journal